Strawberries

Have you ever seen anything so beautiful?  On our way back from chemo and radiation, and a consult with the PA from oncology we stopped at a local place and picked up a half crate of the juiciest, ripest, sweetest strawberries I have seen in long time.  These babies are sooooo good, and not a bad one in the bunch. 

All of us were up early this morning (like 5:00 a.m. early).  Me to get a couple of hours of work in before going to Everett for appointments.  Mom and Dad to flush the j-tube which had been going all night.  Flushing consists of pushing water into the tube via a large syringe.  This both cleans the tube and provides an extra bit of fluids for Dad, keeping him hydrated.

Tuesday's are usually long days as Dad gets both chemo and radiation.  Today's treatment was fine.  His white and red blood cell counts are kind of low, his hematorcrit is kind of low, and his platelets are more than kind of low. Low enough that if they're not better next week or have gone down, he may forgo the last round of chemo.

We made a stop at Wendy's on the way back for the standard Frosty, and Dad asked to go in as he says he enjoys the smells of "real food".  Mom and I were happy to oblige.  I should probably do a whole post dedicated to Wendy's and their amazing Frostys.  They are just the right consistency.  Come in vanilla or chocolate (or the Carlson-preferred mixed option) and stay thick but smooth long enough to slowly eat the distance it takes from Smokey Point in Marysville to Olympic View Place in Stanwood.  Anyway, we've been looking for other places that serve a shake or malt that compare to Wendy's (the trials we go through :-) We've tried a few different places looking for the right consistency, a decent flavor for Dad's drug-addled taste buds, and most importantly no chunks, or big enough chunks that he can eat around them. So much fresh fruit is in season right now or will soon be ready and lots of places are advertising fresh strawberry shakes. Dad really, really wants a fresh strawberry shake, but unfortunately it's just not working for him.  However, this doesn't keep him from trying.  And Mom has pureed different stuff to put in a smoothy, serve over ice cream, or just freeze (the watermelon granita has been a special favorite.)  We picked up a "soft serve ice cream maker" yesterday and are hoping that we can add various flavors to that to keep Dad interested.

Anyway, we got back from our day and I, being me, proceeded directly to my room for a nap (5:00 a.m. people!).  I emerged from my room a couple of hours later to find out that Dad has been suffering one of the nastier side effects chemo and emptying the contents (however little it might be) of his stomach.  And Mom has been by his side for all of it.  Night's have been tough for Dad as when the j-tube is going for feedings, he can not lay down flat.  There's also been a learning curve for how much can go in at a time and the best ways to take care of the tube and all it's apparatus.  Tough for Dad, but maybe even tougher for Mom who is up with him through all of it, and working to try whatever to make it better, while still having to be the taskmaster to keep pushing fluids, and nutrients, and drugs, and trying to calculate how much has gone in and how much has stayed down.  And, not to complain, but tired/exhausted Dad without the outlet of his workbench, or garden is a cranky Dad, and Mom bears the burden of that more than anyone. 

I came out to the kitchen to find that in between the bouts of nausea in the bedroom (sorry, that sounds like T.M.I.) Mom has cleaned and hulled most of the berries we bought earlier.  Freezing some and mashing the rest... to make a sauce for Dad...  to try in his ice cream... but probably to end up the same place as today's frosty (definitely t.m.i.). 

I started this rather long rambling post asking if there was anything more beautiful than the cleaned and hulled fresh strawberries posted above, but I'm going to end with what, to me, is even more beautiful. 

The work of a tired and exhausted woman. Giving the largest portion of the treasure of strawberries.  Mashed in a bowl ready to be strained to get juice to make a sauce to go in a shake that may or may not go down and may or may not stay down. All in the hopes of giving some comfort.  A picture of love.